jajunk

I just had an awesome shower
And it is totally my own fault- I stepped into my tub and said to myself, you know what this is going to be an amazing shower. And it was. I was a little kid in there. Well I didn't fill the tub and start playing with toys, but I totally had a soundtrack and dance moves going on. The 2nd movement upon the application of conditioner was especially sensational.

And I had the thought of how cool it would be to put my musical monologue into words, into language, here on Livejournal. I could somewhat see the lettering and phrasing as it was typed on this white screen. I couldn't really do it though because I don't type fast enough. I type real s-l-o-w and the tempo was quick.

But it struck me how much I like typing in my journal. And you know what else? I love you guys! All of you. I love writing to you and I love reading you! I don't expect anything from you. And by the way if you ever want to stop being online friends one day, I would be fine with that. I'm here for something simple, and I have that, so I'm really just enjoying myself.

I wish you could have experienced the shower the way I did
I wish to meet every one of you
I want to write every one of you a song- just one for all of you:)
And I want you to see this for what it is

Alright guys
Time to get motivated!
Everything's so fine!

Ants crawl on my desk and my computer, and my bathroom sink.
It doesn't bother me. They never bother me.
When they are on my sink I go to my brother's. When I accidentally flood them with water I try to save them by gently soaking up the water using a small piece of paper towel and then moving them to higher ground. If I kill them and only realize later I always spend a moment reflecting on impermanence and karma.

Btw, I'm not that messy so I don't know where these ants are coming from. There aren't very many (except on my bathroom sink sometimes) but I do see them maybe once a day crawl across my screen. They are tiny black ants. They can stay here forever for all I care.

I wanted to write this because I remembered a dream I had last night where I walked into my bathroom and there were ants covering my sink and it didn't bother me.

So last night I played billiards at a bar with my friends Shawn and Luis, and wow I was pretty good at that game! That's really cool. I woke up this morning at Shawn's with a hangover but his dog is a cutie pie and I immediately felt good. Water helped.

Then I went to Guitar Center with Anthony and I played an AMAZING Taylor guitar. Ohmygosh I was so happy playing it. And a ukulele!! I picked up a ukulele, tuned it to itself, and started just playing it without knowing a thing about it! That is great.

Anthony has some issues, but I really love him. I look into his eyes and I see a dog, one I love. I think he is a beautiful person and I hope he solves his problems.

It occurs to me that we can use problems as mirrors, to reflect back to us our true nature.

So tonight I canceled my lesson with the beautiful and generous family that I go to every Thursday (but we moved it to Tuesday for this week, just before I canceled) and I went online to chat with Berklee students about Berklee. I am God. And I'm going to BERKLEE!!!!!!!!!

Some people get off on how others possibly perceive them.
Some people think being "cool" matters.

Be cool mothafucka ya'll know the rules.
Stay cool!

You know, you shouldn't spend you days writing out the different ways to look at things and life
because you'll never be right. You'll never be right.

I believe there's truth in anything.
I believe in causality.
I believe there is no permanence; I believe in an omniverse.
I believe music is the best thing ever.

my head -still- hurts.

oh, ow ow... (my head hurts)
And my stomach......eghhh
I actually got drunk last night
It wasn't worth it.

My favorite note is right at 1:41 [in the second video.]

Well, these two entries are uninteresting but hey I wanted to put it down in words.

Livejournal is the shit. I honestly miss the days when everyone had one. Here's how I remember it: Livejournal, then Myspace, then Facebook. Myspace was cool because you could color it up and it was basically a webpage of you. Facebook came along soon after and (again) normalized everything into some really bland phonebook/rolodex sort of thing. In a way that's good, for professionals who network or whatever. Myspace had more pizzazz but was flooded with nonsense very quickly.

So Livejournal. The shit! Here we maintain a journal and we make it into whatever we want. We don't need a page to paint our faces or color in our interests. We are in a flux, like our journals. In this way all we can ever do by posting entries is point towards something. It's really great!

Maybe it's not the ideal social networking tool or the place to befriend local musicians, but it can certainly open you up to other worlds in a meaningful way if you ask me.

One of my entries below could have been summarized:

A good teacher doesn't blab but knows how to give the moment something that can be handed over
What is this something?

Today, I told the girl I was rooming with for a week in October that teachers are the thread of the fabric continuum that is evolutionary humanity. I didn't like that metaphor on my way home. I like to think we actually do the sowing and that that is a much better depiction. How we sow...the material of the thread.,

It's not really like that either though. Hmm...
A teacher and student - connection
the teacher's technique and interests - the play
and equanimity.

And music, yeah. In all it's boundlessness, yup.

Title for this entry: Karma

So, that girl is a teacher. She's not really a girl, but she acts like it...(and oh god she lives with her parents too...) Our short meeting was strange (I was there for a key) at least to me, but I tried to make the most of it of course. I ownder how long she's been at her parents' house.

Yawn

In other news, meat is good for you.

I'm gonna brag about something, but very quickly so, and mostly for the purposes of remembrance.

I have become so patient at my job. So patient that I have learned well that I must constantly relearn patience to be patient. My job isn't hard for me, but that's because I'm good at it. Teaching kids music and guitar isn't for everyone. I go through phases like all of us, and my teaching always reflects my present interests and state of mind. Anyways, the biggest challenge at my job is the kids that I have a hard time connecting with. It can really be frustrating, but I've learned that that is the case when I am giving up, trying to close them into a box that I am comfortable with (and of course there's no fit, so I start losing my hair) but when I stop holding on to what I claim works and start looking for a way to connect what it is I'm trying to teach to the kid that's in front of me, then I surprise myself with my awesome creativity.

These thoughts mostly stem from one of my Saturday students that I was sure was hopeless. His memory is terrible and he is so nervous that his mind is kind of foggy and he can't concentrate, always on the lookout for distractions. I'm no expert on mental healthy, but I think he might suffer from some illness- though quite frankly for better or worse I have little to no regard of such things in my teaching style. In any case, I DID IT. I TAUGHT HIM TO READ MUSIC.....and I'm sure no one else at my job could have done it. --- eeeee, ggggg, ooooo! I want to brag about how I created a new system of reading music that worked perfectly for him, but 1) then I feel I have to brag about how well I teach all my other kids, and 2) I have better things to do. Besides, my entry's complete.

Oh, one more thing: We (my Saturday student and I) discovered the "triumphant note" in Amazing Grace, and I'll never forget that.

I CANT WAIT TO GO TO SLEeP EARLY AGAIN TONIGHT!!

Anybody here enjoy poetry? Would you be interested in reading some of my lyrics? I want to hear your opinions, advice, interpretations, whatever. It shouldn't take long. Let me know if you can help me out and I'll send you a message. Thanks a lot.

This is the hardest I've laughed ALL DAY.

Please enjoy the links I've placed below. I'm going to share them in the order that I found them:

Miracle Whip writes a bold and threatening letter to Stephen Colbert!
Read it here: http://i.imgur.com/60zp8.jpg

I hadn't seen the referenced episode yet, but luckily someone linked it on Digg:
http://www.brandfreak.com/2009/10/stephen-colbert-defends-mayo-from-vicious-miracle-whip-attacks.html
(It's a short, 3-minute clip)

Hilarity ensues!!

This is it. This is the musical process:

something to be said ----technique---> sound/voice

Music is art. Music is a language. It is human, and it is universal. All these things.

More later.

Phish is playing four nights in South FL for New Years.

I'm going to be in Brazil.

Fuck me.

Breathe.
You've got time. There's no hurry.

That might sound contradictory to Buddhism. A mindful Buddhist reflects on death very frequently, knowing well that there is no time to be lazy. I'm not saying we should be lazy. But I think many of us might be obsessed with the need to be working towards something, constantly- the mindset of, "I must do this and this and then this..." Thoughts like that distract you from the task at hand, from the act of progressing through things mindfully. It really isn't useful. It's more useful to keep yourself as organized and work as hard as you can, creating quality work. Simply that. If you are not meeting your deadlines then, at least you know well you tried your best and learned to plan differently for next time. Chances are doing this you'll really begin to enjoy what you're doing and maybe exercise some lateral thinking both in your waking life and in your sleep.

Everything that you do is carrying on as karma. Your actions, thoughts, attitude... A good Buddhist practice is simply recognizing what is useful and abandoning what is not useful and sticking with it until you notice the need for change. I suspect if you are open enough you might find that change is always occurring, so I wonder what implications that would have on one's practice.

But anyway. We don't need to be what we think we need to be. We can just strive diligently with what's at hand.

I talked to Rick Peckham today, the assistant chair of the guitar dept at Berklee. He was calling me back because I left a message about possibly playing classical guitar with a pick-style technique. I'm glad he was enthusiastic about my question cuz I felt it was kind of petty and I'm sure he's a busy guy.

You know what's funny? I've seen videos of Rick online and he reminds me of a bird...and his last name is Peckham! hahaha, I just realized this! hahaa

So he told me they used to only allow classical guitar with traditional fingerstyle, but they've opened up a lot in recent years. I could certainly play a classical with a pick he says. Which made me very happy, even if I'm not sure I want to study that over there. I think not a lot of guitarists have experimented with classical guitar with a pick. The only notable one I can think of is John McLaughlin, bless his heart. It would be cool to study that because, 1) I enjoy the sound, 2) the classical guitar is a meatier instrument and would build up my muscles/strength more effectively, and 3) it would be a unique thing to do in a college where there are certainly hundreds or more guitarists doing the same exact thing: stratocaster, hollowbody, or slim Parker/Ibanez-style electric guitars. Of course it's not fair to throw those into the same pile: even Ibanez and Parkers are drastically different; and on that note if I were lopping them together I might as well have thrown stratocasters in there. But a nylon classical with a pick would be in another ballpark, as they say.

Presently, I own a crappy classical Yamaha guitar that I *ahem* acquired from my high school ages ago. I love that thing. Like I said in a post a month or so ago, the sound of it is in my ear. I know what it sounds like all over. But if I were going to seriously take that instrument as my primary instrument in the college, I'd probably invest in a better model.

I also asked Rick Peckham about hybrid picking (using pick and fingers together) and he said that there's someone in the faculty named Guy Van Duser (unfortunately he was one of the ones who I could find no info on back when I was researching the guitar faculty) who recorded with and arranged a tune for Chet Atkins, to which I responded, oh cool! I was listening to Chet Atkins yesterday! The tone of his voice became higher and turned enthusiastic there as he told me briefly about Van Duser's arrangement for Stars And Stripes Forever and his fingerstyle approach. It was probably the high point in our short talk. Then I asked him about if they had teachers there that could teach slap-style on the guitar a la Victor Wooten (even though I already knew they had it, just to hear his response) and he said he doesn't know for certain but is fairly confident that between the 60+ guitarists they have there that are available for private lessons, a student could learn pretty much any technique that he or she wanted to learn. So that's it; I thanked him for calling me and answering my questions and that was that.

:)

JazzReview: Hiromi, if you will, define Jazz.

Hiromi: Pure freedom.

-What is happening right now-

That's what I try to focus on. Getting anywhere isn't the point. Even getting to some place where you are consistently in conscious observation of the moment isn't the point. The point is re-learned over and over, here, now. It's only here, so there's nowhere else to turn to but to the infinitesimal in-betweenness of this experience right here. The past is gone, the future is only inevitable. Right here is where we abide, in any and every circumstance. Returning to this and thus re-learning becomes easier very quickly once you stop thinking there's a right way to do it and start just paying attention to what's happening.

My only hope is to improvise. I'm so bad at memorizing so-called "tunes". Sooo bad. It's so difficult for me. I blame it on the fact that I don't listen to the same damn songs over and over like some others do! And I never have, except for Phish and Umphrey's McGee. So I never got the hang of memorizing songs; I instead would FEEL IMPROVISATIONS AKA JAMS.

These bands, Umphrey's McGee and Phish, are -IMPROVISATIONAL BANDS-.

And it's feeling them over and over that gave me my intuition on structure, stacked parts, flow- and I happily exercise this by listening to a variety of music today. Only the best music in the world reaches my ears! Just the same as how I only come across the best people these days.

My only hope is to embrace improvisation. I can do it well, and it's what excites me the most. I write songs, I go for a variety of musical styles, I dream of being a versatile musician. My problem is that my technique can be sloppy but I sound good and my ideas are good. My ear is good when it comes to melody, but harmonically I wish I were better at anticipating changes. And of course if I were keeping up with my theory, experimenting with all the fascinating scales I love- and, importantly, memorizing and utilizing and substituting them... Well, I guess there's plenty I can work on.

But dammit, jazz is so hard for me. Reading music is hard too when I'm not reading technical exercises or reading exercises. You know, like reading -real music-. I'm quite bad at it. I'm bad at memorizing "heads" and "changes" and then I'm bad keeping up with changes when they're not in front of me. When they're in front of me I'm fine; I can create melodies all day long over them since I know the fretboard and I'm creative. Still can't swing controllably though. I should learn a Charlie Parker solo just to fix that up, but there's so many other things I'm doing presently.

Somehow I'm going to have to do it though: I'm going to have to be able to play jazz good enough to get through the Berklee undergraduate program and be able to read really well. I'm gonna have to do it. Mastering solfege would be awesome too, and it would be my main ticket into any kind of music professorship.

If I become a professor, I'm gonna make sure it's someplace where I can go all out. I have some awesome ideas. I'm going to teach konnakol!!

So much to do, just to please myself. I can perform for others and I enjoy my music and my sound, but I know I'm capable of more, and that's what drives me like this.

the problem with teaching, and teachers.

You can't teach others to create. There you go. You can give orders and instructions, you can offer a new way of looking at something, you can share a grammatical technique or vocabularic phrases. But you can not teach someone to be artful, to be themselves, to express anything. You can only offer experience.

That's why I think these teachers are losers: Teachers, who Teach others, thinking they are doing anything beyond feeding ideas and knowledge- they lose. Teaching is not educating. There is a difference.

If a child is wrongfully damaging property you cannot just teach him/her how to behave and respect others' things. You might impulsively demand obedience, but that doesn't work and we eventually end up dead and it's over. You have to educate them experientially; you have to wake them up, shake them if you have to.

For the unopened child, perspective is crucial. If one altruistically decides to act as an educator, they should see each moment as a gateway to and endless well of learning, and they will automatically then share it with others they interact with. The right lessons keep teaching, over and over again.

If I aim to be a teacher, I will die unhappily. If I aim to teach I will be living out my days under the impression that I'm doing some good [and whew so I can relax cuz I'm a good person!] No. I fully realize deep in my heart that the only thing that will make me happy is to become that which can continuously offer firsthand experiences of creativity, to anyone, in any circumstance. This requires technique, this requires a calm mind, this requires creative practice and interaction with others.

That is the only way to wake anyone up. Words will only confuse them. Ideas box them in. Demands overwhelm them. But being an example of yourself is effortless. Experience is educational. Teaching, is a downward spiral for both parties.

http://www.cnn.com/2009/US/11/04/florida.jail.attack/index.html?eref=igoogle_cnn

An inmate attacked a jail guard while he was alone on duty and other inmates came to the guard's assistance, restraining the attacker and calling for help on the radio. This happened in Florida.

Apparently a new proposed treaty on upholding copyright laws online has been leaked. It's tentative; I'm sure it'll be different before it's put into effect. But it's still not a very good sign. Some agree that what's presented here is unenforceable. I wonder what countries will stand for it.

The treaty states:

* That ISPs have to proactively police copyright on user-contributed material. This means that it will be impossible to run a service like Flickr or YouTube or Blogger, since hiring enough lawyers to ensure that the mountain of material uploaded every second isn't infringing will exceed any hope of profitability.

* That ISPs have to cut off the Internet access of accused copyright infringers or face liability. This means that your entire family could be denied to the internet -- and hence to civic participation, health information, education, communications, and their means of earning a living -- if one member is accused of copyright infringement, without access to a trial or counsel.

* That the whole world must adopt US-style "notice-and-takedown" rules that require ISPs to remove any material that is accused -- again, without evidence or trial -- of infringing copyright. This has proved a disaster in the US and other countries, where it provides an easy means of censoring material, just by accusing it of infringing copyright.

* Mandatory prohibitions on breaking DRM (basically using any access control technologies, like bittorrent), even if doing so for a lawful purpose (e.g., to make a work available to disabled people; for archival preservation; because you own the copyrighted work that is locked up with DRM)

http://www.boingboing.net/2009/11/03/secret-copyright-tre.html
This link is a summary, from which I found the points posted above. Here, you can find more info: http://www.michaelgeist.ca/content/view/4510/125/

I wonder where this will all lead. I'm personally excited just for this to start getting some attention.

The Return from Iraq - Click here for the most popular videos





fuck wars.

With regard to my post about the internet and it's implications on our future...

I think it would be necessary to find a way to maintain a library that organizes all information but also keeps order in such a neutral way that accessibility is entirely unbiased and all content can be publicly reflected on.

I wonder how this will be. Maybe we need to change our interface (our computers) and maybe even the internet; maybe we should have a single Page that encompasses all of this- probably run by Google and Wikipedia2.0 or whatever.

I'm sure that if everything were freely available, new content would be of a higher quality. More would be expected of society, and possibilities will go through the roof. With such Great Ambition, maybe we can unite as a hard-working, scientific, explorative, and developing species. Maybe we will find greater interests and stop fighting and wanting so much.

I have found everything I have ever wanted in an online English Dictionary. It even includes the word 'ninja' in its domain name. I never thought I'd see the day... I'm so happy.

It is: http://ninjawords.com/

Fast, saves your words, no messy ads. The definitions come from Wiktionary. (I learned in the about page.) You can even compare multiple words/definitions in one smooth search!

Anyone know other great sites like this? Maybe a great thesaurus or rhyming dictionary? A place to search for idioms?

It's hard to google these things because it instead just loads up the most popular reference tools along with the results for any other words you've used in your search. Annoying!

I'm inspired by the discussion with Elaine in my last post, so I thought I'd share some other thoughts in addition to my commented response to her.

The topic is the spread of digitalized content online and its implications on the future. I take the stance of supporting this [what-I-call] unstoppable and exponentially growing phenomenon and simultaneously support artists and other content-givers, mainly those unpopular enough to not have glamored their way into pop culture, and thus a lot of true-spirited givers.

My idea is basically to somehow both embrace the spread of material online while encouraging artists and teachers to share their material freely and continue to develop and produce new content.

I think we can agree that we are experiencing exponential globalization. With my ideas, soon everyone with internet access on Earth can learn anything, become anything, meaning there will be no financial or regional limitations on the pursuit of knowledge. I think this is really possible and it's a thought that pleases me.

If artists and teachers and writers are entering a world where they are paid by a government to do what they do and encouraged by donations of fans and avid aspirants, there would be cultural shifts in values, motivations, and behavior and ethics. Awareness will arise of the value of not just content-givers but also of the incomparably rich experience of real-time artistic performance or personalized instruction. This is a big step forward in evolution and human growth in my opinion, and it can have a tremendous impact on our general outlook and appreciation of the world.

I see an obvious problem, and it is karmic in nature. Basically, where we are as a society this idea is interpreted as ludicrous; that is because we can't really imagine such a world so different from the one we are in. The first thing people are scared of is getting there, to any balanced state of society without crashing and burning. It's not enough to just have the right answer and follow it through- that is, be an example of the evolved human for anyone and everyone to witness, keeping your eyes directly on the prize, so to speak. We have to be realistic and compromise, baby-step our way over there. That's because of karma (causes and present effects of causes and actions towards future causes and effects.)

Our karma is such that we fear: 1) Artists, instructors, writers, and other content-givers will not be given the direct support they need and/or require for the specific distribution of particular content, and thus we will suffer due to a destruction of this important aspect of our society. And 2), similar to 1, but that artists, instructors, writers, and other content-givers will not be indirectly supported to create content due to presently being in a society where such a rich and various library of excellent materials have already been illegally exploited and passed about such that one might reasonably conclude there is no more need for any new content.

Let me say why these are not worthy fears. It's simple. Artists and instructors pursue money, and they deserve a good living for what they do. True artists and instructors are blessed such that they know the Impact they have on others; they are thus enlightened to the effects of their actions, which is an irreversible experience, often life-changing. These people are altruistically motivated and cultivate a spirit of generosity. They heroically strive in the sludge of self-centered society even today, because they see their place in the world clearly- and that's really all you have, worldlily-speaking.

These are the kinds of artists we want! These are the kinds of instructors we want to develop our world! These are the people who we want teaching and writing and speaking and thinking! The people who are Aware, alive with clear insight, energetic and generous beyond what we normally acknowledge as human capacity.

And this is developed naturally by simply encouraging it and supporting it. You can start now (not trying to sell you anything) by simply seeing live music and supporting local artists and hell even writing to those who inspire you or meeting in person those whose teachings or method books have helped you out in life. You can start now, because this process has already begun and being a part of it I'm confident in its potentiality of good experience including other fruitful actions. You dig?

We live in an environment where we are-- ahh I won't get into that. The point is that we can peacefully move on to the new age I claim is inevitable. We don't have to have fear. There are no destructive forces inherent in my ideas, only evolutionary. The good that comes from starting now will be enough to motivate us and keep us focused on what's best. And Great Goods will basically be securities in a promising future. I'm thinking pretty big here.

The content-givers we want are those who selflessly give. We want content from Givers. Admittedly I don't have good knowledge in economics and law, so I'm not the right guy to suggest a system that works to getting us there. I can only offer my experiences as a musician and teacher and my ideas of what is necessary for a healthy state of society. I wouldn't mind relying on donations; I wouldn't mind interacting with avid aspirants I can relate to. I happily teach anyone who is interested in something I can explain. I happily play music for free for someone who wants to listen. There are many others like me because I know and have learned from them.

There really is a lot of stuff already out there. Really great stuff. It's irreversible: even if they stop bittorrent or even ways to digitalize content such that it is distributable, the damage has been done, so to speak. What's out there will never go away. Thousands upon Thousands of people have it backed up somewhere, and sharing it is easier than ever. Indeed it seems we don't need anything new. You can find libraries of useful information on almost any topic. Maybe any topic. Courses in philosophy, languages, religion, sciences; audiobooks already created or others recording ones themselves; instructions on how to build things, learn kung fu, set up a small business, draw human figures, program in any language... Indeed it might seem there's nothing that can be done, because everything is spoiled and there's nothing new that is needed, but that's not true on account of evolution and the fact that our progressive desires and ambitions are as real and unmistakable as the flow of time in every second. Basically, "we ain't seen nothing yet." The future will be loaded with richer and more accessible content that will be better suited for our evolving ambitions and worldly conditions...especially if we unleash the entirety of what is already available here and now!

Very last thing: Again, I think the large-scale distribution of digitalized content will actually help put into perspective how important it is to have teachers and performers who you can interact with and observe in real life.

(It's a real shame that there are still so many without internet access these days.)

OK. I'm done. Those are a bunch of my ideas and I think some of them are good. I'd of course love to read any thoughts y'all might have.

This is pretty much all I do: play guitar, prepare for Berklee, do musical things, check out music I haven't heard before, teach guitar four days a week, read, meditate, work out/jog/stretch, hang with my friends a couple of times a week, and spend some time with my family on the weekends. Oh, and I try and watch the Daily Show every night, though I've been missing it all this week.

That's pretty much it. Maybe I'm leaving out some mundane things; but I quit kung fu and the band On A Square and so I'm not in Miami or Coral Springs much anymore, and so I have a lot more time dedicated to the things I listed above. Also, I'm pretty much back to chilling with only my "original" group of friends, so there's that too.

Frankly, I'm fine with my life right now, except for the fact that I want to leave south Florida and move on to music school. But still, I'm enjoying just studying music on my own. I can be lazy and unproductive sometimes, but it's not the majority of the time. I think I spend almost all my time learning/absorbing, but I have a hard time disciplining myself and setting limits on what I ought to do in a day.

Maybe some people think I'm a lazy bum. I guess I look it: messy hair, whatever beard, never wearing a shirt at home, playing guitar all day,....still living with my parents...Gah! I gotta get GOING!

I'm getting better at not reacting negatively to an experience and pointing out to myself when I ought to instead react with compassion. Doesn't mean compassion arises naturally in me or even arises at all everytime, but it's a step forward.

As a result I'm noticing some old, built-up tension I've had for ages; it manifests in the form of these reactions. It's a really startling thing to come across something and realize how negative it is, and how close it was to occurring. It's also startling to know that it comes out of me, of all people. I'm supposed to be kind and wonderful.

Something else I've noticed is that there are different things you can notice in an experience, and being more open to positive things means you actually notice other things that didn't seem to be there before. Your whole perception can shift when what you originally noticed [that would have normally caused a negative reaction] is the very thing that inspires compassion because of some other things you are now aware of that are a part of that experience.

One other thing I want to write about: Some talks given by Robert Thurman on the Tibetan Book of the Dead, as it's called.

I have been listening to these CD's for months. That's how I do it. I'm finally on CD four now (hah) and I've come across something really enlightening.

As I understand it, there is a tendency in western culture to react disturbingly at the loss of a loved one. According to Buddhist philosophy this is not so wise, and as the TBotD points out, your deceased loved one has not vanished, but are in a state where he or she needs to be calm and mindful. It is said that at one point they have extraordinary ability, for instance the ability to be anywhere on Earth in less than a second. I am sure hurt and confused souls wander about, wondering why God's forsaken them and the like. So after hearing Thurman's advice on reading the verses from the Book of the Dead as a service to people who have crossed into the "Between" (and thus reacting to death positively, being a source of encouragement and wisdom to dead ones,) it seems much better a way of dealing with death.

And, importantly, hearing that was an insight into my present life, because I don't want to leave any disturbing traces behind. So when I am gone others can be peaceful and I can be peaceful with them.

In fusion, jazz, world music, and even some (but not much) classic jamband, there is this very apparent quality of freedom of expression when it comes to making music with others and writing your own music. Follow me here: This is because these players play with so many others, other groups and other composers etc, that they don't cling to "their" music/band/etc. They are just free to create, and consequentially they are able to play music by almost anyone with any group of people, making unique and amazing interpretations on the fly, and also they are free to utilize spontaneous or recent creative ideas smoothly in dependence on their present situation. I can imagine ideas or riffs/melodies being put away for a later situation because of some intuition one might have; but beyond that there is no attitude of keeping some particular music close to you or being unwilling to share it openly with others. There is instead an open-minded attitude towards things like instrumentation, people involved, etc. It's like they are truly free to create and not just fit themselves into a box or situation they happen to be in. They respect the fact that music changes and you can't really hold on to it, but you can only play your instrument and continuously master it.

I think getting to this point means playing with a lot of different people. That's how everything works: the more you experience, the more you have perspective, the more you don't cling - it all goes hand in hand. If you are into fusion, you'll know that these musicians basically whore themselves to one-another. Sometimes it's just because they have to pay their bills and stuff.

And how fucking excellent it was? I guess I didn't!

Bela Fleck on banjo
Edgar Meyer on woolly-mammoth bass
Zakir Hussain on tablas

THEY HAVE A CD OUT I VERY HIGHLY RECOMMEND!



I love listening to these guys talk about music. I really love Bela's professional demeanor, his attitude towards being a musician.

Please if you ignore the conversation above, (understandable,) then listen to this song!!

It's really, really good.

and Herb Ellis on guitar, Ray Brown on woolly-mammoth-bass, and Grady Tate on drums, playing great jazz. :]

These days I feel really close to falling over the edge of some kind of musical enlightenment that involves some ideas I've been pondering lately.

Namely, what is music? And that is the Big Question.

I conclude to the best of my knowledge and ability that music is a language- plain and simple. From this arises all sorts of other things, perhaps based on theories of communication and inter-relations/inter-dependence and artistic self-expression. Some might stretch it to include spiritual development and the like, but that opens up a whole other realm of 'what is spirituality/spiritual development?'

I don't feel confident saying that I am in any way musically enlightened, although I think my ideas are wise and the attitude I have to exploring them is wholesome and open. Therefore I'd say I'm simply on a productive musical path and possess good intentions. I don't feel confident claiming enlightenment because my ears have only barely caught up to my ideas and so applying any views I have in any practical sense has only just begun. My hearing can relax and I am training myself to take in sound for what it is, quicker and calmer each time. I will feel enlightened when I can fall back on this as though it is the only natural result of any musical experience. 

I think experiencing this while performing would be a big step forward. Unfortunately last time I performed I was so caught up in other things and processes part of my experience that I am presently convinced this would take repeated practice and further analysis.

Though there is something I feel I can claim, and I think it's profound: I am really starting to enjoy music wholesomely lately. I have enjoyed it like this many times before, but I have also had anxieties before. I think as I mature musically I'm starting to finally see the absolute fun inherent in music and I think that's really important for any musical growth. Good attitude and all that.

I hear friends talk of music and I think to myself, I used to think that/like that.

I want to be able to talk to people like Zakir Hussain about music. Zakir knows music is spiritual and boundless and all these other wonderful things, so talking about those things with him is really mundane since he might probably prefer to not use words and simply play...and therefore I'd like to lose the words and play with Zakir in the spirit of the fun that is music.

Gosh, this is so close-minded, the way I'm portraying it. Music is not only a personal and subjective experience like how I describe but it is also in theory a worldly and stylistic thing, a la musicology and cultural development and stuff.

But really it's all one, that's why you can pick out a Bach piece from any other classical composer- because Bach left an imprint of his personality and his culture in the music he played, AND it so happens the nature of his music is a one that is very sensitive to the the auditory experiences of listeners- which is why I hypothesize any sensitive listener can hear a mistake in any Bach tune- and for this same reason it is very susceptible to [in this case probably only rhythmic] interpretation and individual musicality, ie tempo fluctuation and feel and the like. Pull your audience in by using the music's natural sensitivity, in other words.

At the heart of it it is still a language to me. I'd go as far as to say it is human, too. Truthfully, that last part is a bit of an ego-trip, but I like having something I genuinely feel proud of humans about.

Playing guitar solos is good for you in so many ways.

I happen to be the kind of musician that loves taking solos. Back when I first started learning jazz with the band I was in in high school, playing solos was the thing to do when it was your turn to go at it; there was no pressure or anxiety about it, only the personal challenge of playing the changes correctly and trying to "wow" yourself.

So I'm fortunate I had that introduction to soloing. Today I use my loop pedal a lot and solo over the songs I write and some other things.

Soloing is an adventure in phrasing, more than anything else. You can play spectacular solos by very simply constructing a complete and thoughtful artistic story, regardless of speed and all those things. Even fast guitarists (like Paul Gilbert in the video below) know that speed has little to do with a good solo. Technique is just your means to real-time composition.

All sorts of fun things can be experienced in taking a solo if you treat it like a game. For example, paying attention to what is presently your highest note thus far in the solo is a great thing to be mindful of. A good story-telling device are these high notes, and how to get to them! But it would also be wrong to think of it so linearly, as though you have to make it to some checkpoint/finish-line in an ascending- or descending as the case may be- fashion. It's not wrong to throw in a high note for any reason. Yeah, I just said that! You can hit a high note for an instant just to catch the attention of some particular person walking into the room. It's all about how you want to tell your story. Maybe you wanna sprinkle some fairy noises in your wall of sludge, and that's your motivation for some high notes. Whatever gets you there and works.

But hitting a note has consequences, and I guess this is what people fear when first starting to solo. Learning this and learning to work with it is essentially what it is to solo, so if someone wants to even start soloing they need to just completely abandon fear, with good reason, because they are simply motivated to acquiring some skill that they are convinced calls for fearlessness.

To the person wanting to learn to solo, I would say to try your best to let it flow. A good exercise would be to imagine you are living an entirely musical day, making music all day long in everything that you do. If you can do this and enjoy it, you will enjoy soloing.

You work your way towards a central note; it becomes a centerpiece for now; before you can move on you have to finish that statement...but how do you define what it is to "finish", or even what is "statement"?

It's also really important to appreciate soloing for the game that it is, meaning sometimes you're gonna lose and that's ok. But in the world of continually and indefinite phrasal self-expression, maybe the battle and not the war, you know? Define the 'battle' in the context of the solo. What is the 'war'? It's relative, useful for discussion. It's also all perceptive. Self-expression is boundless because you don't have notes and rhythms or even themes and ideas but SOUND.

and I have a lot of friends. I consider so many people friends. And they deserve my friendship; they are all so wonderful, each with really great qualities. Nothing, not age nor musical preference, nor distance my fellow LJ-ers!, keeps me from making friends with someone who I feel that connection with. As long as we can easily feed the joyful experience of being together there at that moment, that's all that matters. Everything else is just expanding your mind.

So a lot of my closest friends are going to Orlando, to some Disney parks, this weekend for Ryan's birthday extravaganza. I decided not to go; but now I'm regretting it. I think I belong here this weekend, at my job with my kids helping them to prepare for next week's recital. Plus I really just want to spend my weekend doing what I normally do and play guitar all day and night. I couldn't do that in Orlando. But, this is indeed Ryan's birthday, and so many great people will be there...

and tonight we were in the Everglades again watching a meteor shower with guitar, tablas, mandolin, and some beers, and Shawn made a joke about Luis bringing up something awkward between a different Shawn and his girlfriend because she talked to Luis about their relationship and blah blah blah too much.; and how it'd be funny as hell to bring that up at Blizzard Beach (in Disney) in the family tube (it's a water park; the family tube is a huge tube that everyone fits in.) We all agreed that'd be pretty funny, and it hit me how badly I wanted to be there with them in that tube, floating down the water in the hot sun, probably drunk and burnt out (from the sun, hehe.) Damn, a guy needs to once in a while spend a weekend and laugh like fucking crazy with his good friends. It's good for you. And how often does something like this happen? Well, it might not be such an entirely uncommon experience, but- yeah, wait it's Ryan's birthday. This is gonna be great!

But I really shouldn't go. Honestly, I have the image in my mind of one of my students- one in particular, but also many- practicing for the recital coming up, next week, and he gets to his lesson and, "where's Charles?" A substitute might be there. How sucky would that be, right before a recital the following week?

I mean these recitals aren't a big deal or anything. They just decorated the lobby of the place I work with a simple stage, drum set, PA, and piano setup. I really only have like five kids performing anyways...but I'm sure I can get more to perform by surprising them on the spot. *evil grin* It's good for them.

Yeah, it really comes down to this: I have friends of all kinds, and me being who I am, I have to respect the fact that I've made many friends, and that they all deserve my honesty and loyalty when I promise them something, like keeping a secret or teaching them guitar. Therefore, in a situation where I have one group of friends tempting me with a holiday weekend, and another group practicing everyday at home in anticipation of my promise to help them be the best they can be... there's really only one choice an adult would make.

Damn though, I could get lucky there with a certain lady-friend....

Aiyiyi. haha.

I just watched the anime Kaiba. I really like the artwork. The story was pretty good, but as always I expect so much, especially from a story that is just bleeding with glorious potential. The characters were excellent. Music was pretty good, too.

I want to write an anime someday, or even color an epic story to be created into a videogame...and I'll definitely be writing the soundtrack to that.

Ok, in all honesty that is unlikely- especially an anime, that is highly unlikely- but at the same time, I can really see myself doing such a thing. I would need help for sure. I'd first write the music and then the story. That'd be so cool.

I'm a huge fan of amazing stories... No, 'epic' is still the right word.
Maybe it's because I'm pretty unfamiliar with poor animes, because I've dabbled in relatively few, and most were really excellent in my opinion, but I just think Japanese animation is a really great way to get a story across, whether as an anime or a videogame.

I played Final Fantasy VII back in middle school. The story and music from that game continues to inspire me. I'm teaching some of my students music from that game. How cool is that? :)

I really just soak it up, when there's great art, stories, characters, and music, all in one.

and came across this awesome comment left by user Nullonehalf in a post in the Buddhists community.

He was responding to the story The Questions of King Melinda.

Well said.

A lot of people ask me lately whether I think Judgment Day is near.

I always tell them, "Things are always coming to fruition, at every moment; causes are bearing their effects right now. That is a judgment, and that is an end. You don't need to ask about what's happening later."

Other people ask, "What do you think happens after you die?"

If you ask me, I'll say, "What makes you think it will be different than what's happening now?"

No matter how far we travel, we never cross over the horizon.

I guess I missed this the first time around. Hey Ocha- you said you'd try to remember that analogy, so maybe if you've forgotten I helped you out a bit!

Today is a beautiful day in Florida. There's a bit of a cold front in, and I wasn't expecting it, which is cool. Tonight I go see Béla Fleck, Zakir Hussain, and Edgar Meyer play their incredible music.

I have -never- understood the mentality of "damn that guy is so good [at guitar] it makes me want to quit."

Never, ever. I just don't get it. I am proud to say I have seen numerous really incredible musical moments involving all kinds of talented individuals; it has always only inspired me and if anything made me want to get home as soon as possible and practice!

Chances are if seeing something amazing makes you feel worthless, it has more to do with your practice than anything else. I don't believe you need to have any inherent talent to make it as a musician. I am however willing to believe that "gifts" are real, and that not everything is simply upbringing, but perhaps more importantly than both being gifted and having a good upbringing is the sheer positive outlook on the world, the desire for experience and opportunity, and not shying away from it.

Cuz if you think about it, each of us is capable of a unique musical "message", for lack of a better term. (Actually that's just a horrible way of putting it, but it works in context of what I'm saying.) So if you simply realize you have something to say- and you do, we all do- then you speak it, musically, and that's all there is to it. Your sound will be your story, so there's only reason to embrace that and thus feel the need to practice more and express yourself more. And then appreciation of another's "message" is truly just genuine appreciation. Pretty selfless if you ask me.

Dancing is also pretty selfless, if you ask me...and I guess you did, whoever you are.

In other news, I'm playing my classical guitar like it is a new instrument. I was greatly inspired by Victor Wooten and now my thumb is a mighty weapon!- or at least that freaky lump on the side of it! Yeah, definitely able to killlll.

Sometimes when teaching music, the reactions I get from my students make me feel like society has really lost touch of what music is really all about.

It's not just my students, but my friends too. Actually perhaps most people I interact with daily, because logically I wouldn't feel disconcerted if it were only my students. No, what troubles me is that it sometimes really seems like people as a whole have lost basis with the spirit of creating, expressing, phrasing- these important and natural elements of language and communication.

Imagine people who are often on autopilot when it comes to speaking. It's like that, like they have forgotten that speaking is really an art. Music is a language and playing music is the art of speaking that language. Simple.

So I've been in positions where I'm trying to explain to a student who wants to learn how to express himself and improvise solos that he already knows how to do it because he's been speaking/phrasing/creating expressions all his life; it's really just technique that holds him back, but technique is just passive, means to the end. What's most important, I say, is to have something to say.

And here I am saying these things and it hits me that people think music is just another videogame. It's like we've forgotten that we are actually expressing ourselves daily, making music with each other all the time.

Musicians are often obsessed with notes, patterns, scales, techniques in general. Music herself is so much more. These things fade into one of many, all only equally important.

I don't think everyone has forgotten what music's all about. I'm absolutely sure there are in fact many out there where this fact is second nature to them. They go about their days interacting with other folks who know this truth, see it plainly. I want to be around all those people.

I'm tired of explaining things. I'm tired of instructing, of describing, of repeating myself a million times. I'm tired of believing myself. I want to get out of here and start being the dream that is me.

I don't want to learn to improvise well on piano. I just want sufficient independence in both hands to be able to play changes and compose.

Seriously, I'd be ok with simple half-note lines with my left hand and then noodling for a melody on my right. I don't want to be able to run licks or take a solo. I want to use piano to compose and only compose. And then play my compositions, but for that I'll simply rely on my good muscle memory to please me... and beyond that a real pianist can take over. (Wishful thinking: maybe someday learn to walk some decent lines with my left-hand! That's be great.)

I'm studying out of an excellent and rare book on changes that I acquired as a pdf [and printed out and spiral bound at Office Max] and it has numerous piano examples I can only play with separate hands. I can't for the life of me get my hands to work together independently. Well, I can, but it's soooo slow and time-consuming and difficult for me. Not worth it when I just want to hear the example (since there's no cd) and get on with the next part of the lesson.

I'm actually getting pretty good at sight-reading with separate hands. lol! Therefore I am at best one-half of a pianist. Or maybe this independent action of both hands is what it means to be a pianist, and thus I am not one at all.

In all seriousness, I really need my brain to start re-wiring already. I want that comfortable independence. Like I said above, nothing spectacular- not looking to be Hiromi here- but I do want to be able to compose effortlessly on the thing.

Maybe I'm going about it wrong. Maybe I need a method book or something.

Dang, I just saw this awesome blues guitarist tonight, Albert Castiglia, with my friend Shawn's parents (they invited me.) He was great. He could really rip and he was just such a cool guy. His playing showed a really neat personality. I met him after the show and talked pedals briefly but then I had to go. I think I'm gonna email him to continue the talk.

His playing style reminded me a lot of Hendrix and David Gilmour, and some SRV and a bit of Chicago-blues (that slow blues shit.) It all tasted great, and the bass player he had up there was playing some killer bass lines. Damn I love killer bass lines. Drummer was OK.

And now I'm listening to John Scofield's newest album which- woah!- is so bluesy! How nice! And I have to say, even though that BIG and bold, even messy sounding blues playing of Albert Castiglia is great and very enjoyable... there's really nothing like the fine, Fine!, fine-ass playing of a guitarist whose instrument is pretty much an extension of their body. Scofield is singing on these tracks! And damn he sounds so good.

I love Scofield. I've seen him twice- once with a trio he had at Warren Haynes's XMas Jam in 2005 (a life-changing event), and once with Medeski, Martin, & Wood at Langerado in 2008 (another life-changing event... Notice a pattern here?)

Damn, I haven't listened to his Uberjam cd in a long time. I think I'll do that tomorrow at the gym. Yeah!

I don't understand why some musicians love so much the jazz that frankly bores me to death.

This includes anything so-called "standard", or even "traditional" jazz. To me, it has ZERO personality; there is no emotion, no soul. It's just nonsense.

Good thing I don't hear much of the stuff in my daily living. Even when I go out and see jazz live, most of the jazzers there actually have a soul- as opposed to, you know, ghosts who can't stop talking notes. It's not the note, but the sound!, I say.

I love so much jazz. So much of it is just completely incredible, outstanding. Which confuses me all the more why there are those who turn away from such masterful composers and players as Duke Ellington, Charlie Parker, and Oscar Peterson, and instead migrate to the boring, boring!, ugly babble.

There's also so much fusion going on, so much new jazz out there. Can't we just let the dummies fade away into the fog of ancient history?

I like a lot of old jazz, and some of the players play standards, or even have a traditional approach, but they all have a beautiful soul that shines out when they play. The sound of a soul being restrained and substituted for nonsense, on the other hand, is my least favorite sound.

You know what it is? Rhythm & blues and folk music mixed with the classical dudes back in the day, and from this some of the greatest music was born, a great majority of it from America. What happens is down the line some people forget their roots, and they just fly out into space and play chaotically, with no respect to human listeners.

But then there's people like John Coltrane, who I think really progressed throughout his career from the horribly babble to beauty never before heard of; and he can play advant garde and it turns out terribly beautiful. It's totally in the moment, and bold and sometimes crazy... certainly in space, but I can happily absorb it.

So the out-in-space thing ain't it. It's really just a matter of soul, I guess.

Maybe it's like this, humans are capable of creation through both mechanical means and soulful means, and the trick in it is to find a balance that's right for you.

Though I have to say that if that means not relating to your listeners you have to do some reconsideration.

I think so. No! I must fight it!

Ah damn, I didn't eat dinner. I had that fucking protein shake that nearly made me puke at the gym.

I'm only in the mood to eat apples!


Anyways. You know sometimes I think that I want to delete my Livejournal again, but then there's times like these when I need to post to LJ-land that I am sick for little to no reason!

Btw, some of my friends on here seem to feel sick too. I hope we feel better soon!!

Maybe if we all concentrate our minds...
Realize the gigantic Earth right below us
Is swallowing us up,...

Who wants to try it!

Forget "right" and "wrong" notes.
We must become familiar with every note for just what it is.

And what is it? What is a 'G'? An 'Ab'? A 'B'?

If you are a musician like me, you might think of something, upon reading the note's name.

The note speaks a particular color, a particular sound, and when used with relation to another note, it creates something more, closer to a more intricate expression.

Like particular words, they can be put together to say something, or simply turned upside down and thrown into a peculiar conversation to be given new meaning.

There are twelve notes to choose from. Each of them sound different.
Turn on a song and play a note one hundred times. Become comfortable with the sound of that note in contrast to that song.
Then change the song, to one with a different sound. How does your old friend sound now?
Do this with one hundred different songs, playing the note a total of ten thousand times.

Alternatively, you can keep the same song looping, and play the next note down or up for one hundred times. Continue until you have done all the notes. Hear what they all sound like.

They all say something different. None are wrong or right. They are just tools of a deeply expressive language.

Love a note like it is your baby and you'll never turn away from the sound of it again.